I’ve talked here about my issues with chasing after love, and with my history of being abandoned or thrown away. I’ve also talked about never chasing, and only attracting. Why must I learn this lesson over and over? Because apparently I think my love is strong enough to fix people’s wounds, heal their broken hearts, solve their issues. I need to really stop it. Once again, just stop it. If someone wants to be in my life, they will be there and stay. They will make the effort to stay. If not, well then I have to let them be free to go, to leave, to abandon me. It’s the hurt I am having the most trouble with. I always welcome these people with open arms. Then when the gut-punch comes, I’m sick. I can’t eat. I cry. It's really all about them, not me. People are inherently selfish. We just are. We look out for number one....a lot! I just wish for a better world, I'm an optimist, a dreamer, a person who wants to make changes, make the world better, leave things, (and people) better than they were when I first saw them. I want reciprocal love and friendship. I don't want to play petty games, and that include the GUESSING games. Sometimes this shit is just too damn hard, and I want to give up. I can't though, its just not in me to do that. Maybe for a day, or a week. But then I always get all sunshiny and optimistic again. Please try your best not to hurt other people, please try not to leave victims in your wake, protect yourself from harm....but do not harm others in your quest! Can't we just take care of each other??
You're very honest with yourself, and with others. Don't give up on finding all your dreams